Johann Hari’s TED talk – ‘Everything you think you know about addiction is wrong,’ has been an inspiring insight into addiction and a favourite of mine for sometime. It’s a powerful tool to share with those working their way through the trials of addiction with someone they love, it brings understanding, reason, new possibililty and a more connected, inclusive approach to healing and positive, sustainable change.

A beautiful invitation to deepen our understanding, compassion and response to those who feel disconnected from themselves, their family, community, and especially their heart and soul.

When a close friend or member of our family have an intimate affair with drugs it’s an opportunity for us to walk the talk. To be present, unconditional love, truly compassionate, to let go of blame, guilt, judgement, to have clear boundaries, keep them close and shed light in the darkness so the truth can prevail.

Remembering every challenge is opportunity for growth. This is the human experience, consciousness is called for here. Believe me when I say ‘nothing will ever teach you the depths of authenticity, compassion, non judgement, non blame of yourselves or others as the journey this can take you on. Walking this journey consciously can gift you more than you will ever know’

Remembering that love is neither complacent or inactive. Love comes in many forms including tough love, authentic conversations, clear boundaries, the word No, truth … all delivered from love as opposed to fear.

Remembering that drugs are only one addiction, what we see in another gives us opportunity to heal the addictions we carry ourselves, however big or small that might be.

Work, money, fitness, extreme sports, chocolate, food, self harm, smoking, sex, gossip, drama, chaos, unhealthy relationships, even blaming ourselves for our children’s inflictions … a plethora of opportunity lives here.

People do what we do, not what we say.

Healing equates to wholeness, remembering you are already whole.

Reconnecting to who you really are, to remember you are already whole, to be the embodiment of self love, to self nourish, to be authentic and live your truth. That’s what’s called for here.

When you love yourself fully, you give others permission to do the same. In seeing the light in yourself, you can see the light in another until they can see the light in themselves. See their light not their darkness, hold the essence of who they are, their light in your heart, send love, send light to their heart everyday until they can do the same.

Be not the victim of their choices, but the warrior of truth in grace, be their light until they can come home lovingly, truthfully to the truth in themselves.They are love, you are love and we are never alone.

Knowing sometimes that’s not their souls story, there is something they are choosing to experience on a soul level we, even they will never know or pretend to understand. In that space also lives a deep and uncomfortable acceptance that we can love, show up, be present, connect do everything we know, but we cannot control.

In this place seek the light, where darkness starts to grow. Be committed to the truth that there’s something’s we will never know.

Give solace to the truth that you ache in your heart and soul. Be truthful to the grief and sadness and then let it flow, but don’t let it consume you and steel your heart away. Don’t be the victim of another’s circumstance and push others away.

Be committed to your own wholeness, be committed to the truth that you are already whole.

Let this be the gift they give you, a true understanding and connection to your soul. It’s not a comfortable journey but one that can gift you with more than you ever thought you needed to know.